Hi! I hate to be one of those blogs where every entry is all “SO SORRY I HAVEN’T BEEN UPDATING GUYSSSS. I’VE BEEN SOOOO BUSY…” so I’m just not gonna bother with the apology and move on to what I’ve been up to the past 3 weeks. Hehe.
So in the past 3 weeks I…
1) Quit my job (LOL)
2) Watched all 3 seasons of Community, plus the 6 new eps of season 4.
3) Downloaded Sims 3 pets for $43 (wtf?!)
4) Reconfigured my life. Again.
Yeah so the job wasn’t as amazzzzinggg as I thought it would be. I actually feel really stupid for thinking that it would be so perfect.
But I think I’ve taken home important lessons from each of my jobs. And I realise how little I appreciated being at BT. I didn’t realise how much of a big deal it was, and I really didn’t give myself enough credit for the stuff that I did. Like, I kept feeling so inadequate. But instead of looking back at the things I could’ve done better, I should’ve looked forward to do the coming things better.
Not that I regret leaving. I didn’t really have a choice, what with needing my degree and all. Some people will think me stupid for passing up on BT for a degree; most will say I needed to do it because everyone needs a degree right now. But can I just say that if a poly kid ever asks you for advice on whether or not to get a degree, please don’t say “do it” just for the sake of getting a degree. Think carefully about what you want in life and how you’re going to get there. Some people don’t need a degree, that’s fine. Some people want to work for big corporations and climb up the corporate ladder, so they do need a degree and that’s fine. But please, for the love of god, don’t generalize and say “everyone needs a degree” because, well, fuck you. Get out of your cookie cutter mold and do what you think is good for you.
So anyway.. Yesterday I took a trip to SPH to pay my editor a visit. Hopefully now I’ll be writing more for BT, 2-3 stories a week I told her. I think writing is fine, it’s looking for stories that’s difficult. But hopefully now I’m a bit more inspired to actually look out for stories, which means going out and actually meeting people. *shudders*
But the really funny thing here is how I’ve gone full circle. Somehow or other, I keep getting pulled back to BT. I wanted to leave so I could explore the world and see what working life was like outside the comfortable yet stressful environment of SPH but all I saw was… bleakness. Granted, I’ve not seen enough or experienced enough and maybe, just maybe, there’s something more wonderful out there. But if I’ve learnt anything the past year is not to reach for the moon when you’ve reached the stars. You’ve just gotta recognise which is the moon, and which the stars.
I think I’ve reached a point where I really don’t care what other people are doing, or if I’m doing okay for my age or whatever. I should’ve known that it didn’t matter. That as long as I was happy, everyone else could pretty much suck it. And friends shouldn’t judge or envy each other. We should be judging other people together. LOL.
So I’m going to stop being so ambitious and let life lead me wherever. And I’m sure it’s going to be okay. No more looking for bullshit jobs or random freelance gigs. I’m sticking to BT. Because let’s face it, they’ve been sticking by me :/